
Google
Let me tell y’all something…
I came to Sampan tonight as a party of one, and from the moment I said “table for one,” it felt like I had announced I was there to inspect the fire extinguishers.
Now, let me be fair. I’m a huge fan of the owner, which is exactly why this review hurts my feelings more than it should.
They sat me at the prep station bar, which was fine. I actually enjoy dining alone. What I don’t enjoy is sitting there so long waiting for service that I started learning the employees’ schedules through observation.
When service finally arrived, my table wasn’t fully set, I had no napkin, and nobody seemed particularly interested in making sure I was having a good experience.
I ordered the chef’s tasting menu thinking I was about to go on a culinary journey.
Turns out it was more of a culinary Uber ride. Fast, confusing, and over before I knew what happened.
No questions about whether I’d been there before.
No recommendations.
No explanation.
My server was moving so fast I felt like I was trying to catch instructions during a fire drill.
The ceviche was okay.
The cheesesteak bao had less flavor than a corporate training video.
And somehow it was greasy enough to leave my hands looking like I’d just finished helping at Jiffy Lube. The problem? No napkin. I had to ask the host for one.
At that point, I started feeling like I was participating in a social experiment.
Most of the tasting menu was forgettable.
Then came the bronzino.
Listen…
That bronzino walked out of the kitchen like Martin showing up at the last minute to save the episode.
The fish was outstanding.
The string beans were excellent.
For a brief moment, I thought we were back in business.
The pork chop was pretty good too.
Then the kimchi fried rice showed up and immediately reminded me why we were in trouble.
I’ve had that dish before and loved it.
Tonight it tasted like the recipe and the seasoning had gotten into an argument and stopped speaking to each other.
I sent it back.
By dessert, I was emotionally detached from the relationship.
I respectfully declined and asked for the check.
Maybe they were having an off night.
Maybe they were understaffed.
Maybe solo diners aren’t their target audience.
I don’t know.
What I do know is that bronzino fought for its life tonight.
That fish was in there working overtime, covering shifts, training new employees, and trying to save the entire restaurant by itself.
Unfortunately, even MVPs can’t win every game.
Sadly, this will be my last visit.